How to Find Your Happy Place

Visiting my happy place is one of my favorite mindfulness practices. And by “happy place,” I don’t mean that metaphysical place in your mind. I’m talking about an actual physical location that lifts your spirits and helps you reconnect with yourself. In a frenetic world, a happy place is a powerful reminder to be present.

Last week, we visited one of my happy places: Stowe, Vermont. (Yes! I’m so happy to have more than one happy place!) And the visit was right on time! As the trip drew closer, my desire to be in Stowe was greater than my desire to be at my home. (And I really love my home!)

A happy place is not just a vacation destination.

Now, you might be thinking, “this just sounds like going on vacation.” And absolutely! A happy place can be a vacation place, but I doesn’t have to be. And it’s definitely not just a vacation destination. For example, I love visiting Miami! I love its steamy heat and diverse culture, but it's definitely not my happy place. I have a great time there, yes! But I’ve never felt like I better myself by traveling to Miami. That work is for my happy place. More than that, I don’t feel like I belong in Miami. But I definitely feel a sense of belonging when I’m in Stowe.

Stowe, Vermont ... my happy place ...

So, allow me to introduce you to Stowe, Vermont, as I experience it: a home away from home … my happy place.

Four years ago, my then-family-of-four visited Stowe for the first time. My sons, X and O, were 4 and 3 years old, respectively. It was the week between Christmas and New Year’s Day - one of the town’s busiest weeks of the year! And it was love at first sight.

Stowe looked like a scene from a Norman Rockwell painting - picture perfect. The snow was coming down steadily as we drove toward the Mountain Road. The iconic Community Church rose proudly in the distance. The landscape was dotted with idyllic barns and covered bridges. The air smelled supremely fresh except for the occasional whiff of burning wood.

The town was at once still and bustling. The fields, hills, even the sky, were so quiet. But the delis and cafes, ski shops and gyms were full of energy. There was a fascinating harmony between the locals and visitors. So much so, I was often surprised upon learning who was from Wakefield, Vermont, or Boston, Massachusetts. Everyone was so open and gracious.

I felt my breaths grow deeper and slower ...

Being in Stowe inspired me to be extra active but also to relax more. During that first trip, I went skiing for the first time in … 20 years! And I easily skied for six hours each day. I also went to sleep early and ate three full meals each day … while sitting down! It was amazing! I watched essentially no television but made time for classics like “Elf.” And even email notifications felt like an intrusion. I felt my breaths grow deeper and slower with each passing day. I felt … light.

A dose of happy

That first visit was magical. As we walked out of our vacation rental for the last time, my sons were crying, “I don’t want to go home! I want to live here!” It was a simultaneously heartwarming and heartbreaking scene. While I didn’t want to move to Stowe, I did understand their sadness. I loved being in Stowe. More than that, I loved how I felt being in Stowe.

So, we visit Stowe regularly for a dose of happy. Regardless of the season or the weather, my heart is refilled with each trip. Oh, how I love my happy place! Let me count the ways:

It puts the small irritations and annoyances of everyday life into perspective.

I love the splendor of the landscape. From the base of the mountain, the views are gorgeous. But from the slopes, the panoramic views are completely breathtaking. Being surrounded by the majesty of nature puts the small irritations and annoyances of everyday life into perspective.

And I really love that extremes of weather don’t slow down the outdoor activities. If it snows, I’ll ski! Too windy to ride the lifts? I’ll snowshoe instead. No snow? I’ll bike! Or swim. Or walk. Or even sit outside! And I love that I’ll see cross country skiers making use of the bike trails and dog-walkers taking their time even in the middle of a storm.

Having wide-open access to the magnificence of the outdoors is at the heart of my connection to Stowe. But the very thought of wind or dirt or cold might repel you. And that’s ok! Your happy place might be a stool in the middle of your local cafe!

So, how can you find your happy place?

Ask yourself these five questions:

1. Is there a place that you’ve visited that often pops into your daydreams? Let’s start here.
2. When you are at this place, are your senses most awakened? Are there scents that are most pleasing to you? Is it fresh ground coffee or the salt of the sea? What about sounds? Is it the constant hum of street traffic or classical music? Which appealing sights are there?
3. Do you feel completely comfortable in this place? Like you can be yourself … free of judgment or facade?
4. Do  you feel this place pulling you to be completely present while you’re there? Or do the typical distractions of everyday life still barge into your head?
5. Are you inexplicably excited to share this place with your loved ones? You love this place and you just know they’ll love it too! You want them to feel what you’re feeling!

I think of visiting my happy place like a mindfulness - what I think of as attention to the present - cleanse. While we are born with mindfulness, it takes practice to access it and utilize it. An occasional visit to Stowe helps! It makes me better … and it makes me happy.

Have you found your happy place?

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